The Whistling Sausage and other Microwave Lunacies.....

Having learned the ill effects of microwave ovens, for years, I refused to own one.  Then one day, a friend of mine came over and said his mother had passed on and he was cleaning out her house, did I want a good microwave oven; as he already had one.  I shook my head and told him he knew how I felt about micro cooking and always preferred to go the long route and prepare my food by cooking it, but he convinced me I needed one. 

So started my learning curve with the oven.  Today, as I was really busy, I stuck a few polish sausagees in there for what I thought was a good time....and walked away...all of a sudden, there was a whistling noise ....thinking the neighbors kids were messing with me, I looked outside, no children anywhere....I kept hearing this whistle and I had no teapot boiling water...all of a sudden, it occurred to me it was coming from the microwave....sure enough, I opened the door and the sausage was just a whistlin away.....I never knew a sausage could whislte before....maybe it was the way they processed it???  Or does food talk to you and tell you it is done cooking???     I will lower the time on it next time or better yet, will not put a polish sausage in there again.....

After trials and errors with this micro cooking, I would say not.  Now most of you I am sure have been cooking with these things for all your lives as they do make life easier to deal with when you are in a hurry.   But some of the things that are said can be put in a micro for certain times are not always correct....or maybe it is just me setting the timer wrong.  

There was the time I went to cook popcorn in there...Now, I have always cooked popcorn in a pot, with a little bit of oil and stovetop cooked it, or made it on a campfire shaking the pan...boy, that tastes good!  Well, micro cooking is different.  And this is when I decided I needed my eyes checked.   I purchased some of this micro popcorn thinking, oh well, lets get in gear here even though I know cooking too much food in there is not good for you as it puts electronic waves through your food and you shouldn't stand too close to it....blah, blah,.......Well, I put the bag in, being careful to make sure "this side up" was up and set the timer.....Evidently, I misread the time on the box and a few minutes later,  I heard this explosion coming from the kitchen....Running in there, all I could think was oh no,  what now?    The bag had exploded inside the microwave and it smelled horrid....So much for setting the oven at 8 minutes.   I went and got my eyes checked after this mishap as I thought it said 8 not three.....The popcorn fell out everywhere and you can imagine it was not fit for the birds to even eat.   What a waste.  

Then there was the time and this was a while back, I am not exactly remembering what I put in there, but mistakenly, I had left a peice of foil on it.   It was a small piece. but let me tell you this, if you have ever put anything metal into your microwave oven, you know what I am about to say....I turned it on and immediately there was this sound, I do not even know if I am able to describe it.  A crackling sound and sparks were flying inside the oven.....Now, when I got this thing, I was not giiven instructions with it, so how was I to know you just do not put any metal into the microwave???    What a light show, and thankfully I got it turned off quickly who knows what would have happened if I had not...I might have had an electical shortage in my house......Live and learn I always say....

Then there was the potato......Do you have any idea what a mess a potato can actually make if it blows up in the microwave???    You do not want to find out.  Thinking it was just like cooking it in the oven, I washed it, stuck it a few times and by this time knew not to put foil in there, wrapped it in a paper towel....Well, who really knows how long to set th timer for???   Oh,  I set it alright....knowing how long it takes one to bake in the oven, I figured it would take about half the time....Again, I went about whatever it was I was doing, probably on my computer and forgot about it for the time being.......Well, this was the wrong thing to do.....there was another explosion in the kitchen.....I was afraid to open the door to the "thing" as I had started to call the micro this, it aggrivated me to know everyone was knowledgable about thiese things but I couldn't even cook popcorn in  one.  

Opening the door, I have never in my life seen such a mess and I cannot even begin to tell you how long it took me to clean it up, but suffice it to say, I bake my potatoes now and use the microwave as little as possible.  Somewhere, I read some things that made me not want to use one anyhow; and I just took it on as a favor to a friend who had to get rid of it.   But you know what, I still prefer to cook the old fashioned way, in the oven, baking and broiling and roasting.....I like a good crockpot too, but those micros as far as I am concerned are for the birds......and I don't think they would enjoy what I stuck in there either.   I purchased some good micro cookbooks, but they sit there unused as I decided it is really a convenience I am able to do quite well without.   After all, I can't cook a baked Alaska in there can I???